Please Use Contraceptive Jutsu! [Zettai Mission]

There were too many kids in Hakagakure. Honestly, the number of healthy children roaming the underground surprised Zettai. He wasn't sure what he would have considered an appropriate amount, but this seemed naturally higher. Maybe it was just the fact that he was standing in the center of a room containing 14 children running around, screaming, and just generally bouncing off the walls. You’ve gotta be kidding me… He thought to himself, staring at the mission flyer in his hand. It specifically said four kids, not fourteen. Sighing, he crumpled it up and stuffed it in his pocket. Narrowly avoiding a wad of… something as it flew past his head, he started snatching kids up into his arms. ”Alright, guys, come on. Everyone into the kitchen. Time for lunch!”

He had expected at least one kid to refuse to eat, but they all immediately flew past him. Struggling to keep his balance, Zettai raised the younger ones above the mass of stampeding young. Following them, he set the toddlers at the table before glancing over at the counter. When he had arrived, a couple of the kids’ mom gave him a basket of bread rolls and smoked ham to feed them. He was glad, because he wasn’t much of a chef himself. Distributing the food, he made sure everyone had a fair sized chunk before taking a bite himself. It was actually very good. Wondering if the mother had made it herself, he almost missed one of the older boys taking his younger brother’s meat. ”And so it begins.. YOU GIVE THAT BACK!”

The day crawled by, with the sun wriggling it's way across the sky until it finally reached eight o’clock. Only a half hour left until the job was up! He was staring out the window in a chair, most of the children getting ready for bed and helping their younger siblings do the same. He had already put the infants in their cribs, all three sleeping soundly. Getting giddy at the thought of freedom, he missed two of the older children sneaking up behind him and pulling a sack down over his head. Before he could stand, they bound His arms behind the chair’s back and wrapped them in duct tape. Immediately, they began to snicker and laugh, proclaiming themselves “Ninja Overlords of the Cosmos”. Sighing, he twisted his fingers until they formed the ‘rat' hand seal.

Calling out the name of his technique - Bushin No Jutsu -, he pushed a portion of his chakra from his body until it collected to his side. Forming into a replica of his own body, it laughed. Leaning in really close to their faces, the clone glared at the little boys. Whispering for them to run, it laughed as they took off screaming. Disappearing in a puff of smoke after they cleared the corner, the clone had fulfilled it’s purpose. Now he had to get untaped. If only he could just… burn it. Reaching into himself as deeply as he could, Zettai ripped as much chakra as he could from himself combined with Fire Nature chakra, kneading it together until it was a homogeneous energy before he released it from every pore in his body. A red haze began to form around him, bathing his body in a soft glow. The sensation that followed was unlike any that he had ever felt before. It was like his body… disappeared. He felt no restrictions in regards to his chakra flow. This was the time to act. Focusing on the duct tape around his wrist, the young man pictured them on fire. Slowly, the red mist condensed into the gray bands before igniting.

Giving a great groan, he pulled his arms with all his might. The fire hurt, but as long as he acted quickly, he would be able to rip the tape apart and free himself. One thing he didn’t think about was the tape melting from the heat and spreading across his bare skin. The pain of the molten glue would probably require medical attention at some point, but it wasn’t urgent. Freeing himself, Zettai rubbed the fire out before running to the sink and dousing his arms in water. Sighing in relief, he dried himself with a towel, folding it and returning it to the stove where it had been hung. Turning, he cracked his neck. Time to teach those boys a lesson. Suddenly, the front door opened and Zettai was relieved to see the den mother. Giving out a cry of happiness, he ran to her. Bowing, he thanked her for the job before running off. He was free! Now all he had to do was check himself as done with the receptionist, and he was gold.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

D Rank mission

Word count successful. Mission approved. Go put up a claim.